Failure

How does one cope with failure?

I would like to reminisce the past....

I have always been a good student back in my high school days. I even graduated top in my class. Maybe because there were only about a hundred graduating students from my alma mater. But hey, that's still something. I still remember hearing my name called 7 or 8 times to receive my medals. My parents were beaming with pride. I think my father had a smile that reached from ear to ear every time he went to the front to put my medal on me.

As a result of being top in the class, I received a scholarship in the university I studied at. My tuition was free for the 1st semester and will be for the next semesters to follow provided I make it to the top 10 of the Dean's List. I made it to the Dean's List but was not able to be in the top 10. I knew I would not make it , my classmates were definitely smarter than me.

When I received my report card, I think I cried for getting a grade that started with 7. Maybe it was 77 or 78. I never got that before and it was terrible to have gotten such a low grade. That was a disappointment. My parents now had to fork out some cash for the 2nd semester's tuition fee.

The results of my 2nd semester performance was much worse. I cried buckets of tears when I got my report card. I was devastated. I failed 2 subjects, it was in a math subject (I cant remember what it was called, it had lots of Differentials, etc), I think the other one was Physics. I had to take summer classes as a result of this FAILURE.

As my studies progressed, I learned to accept 75s and 76s. Yes, it was better than a failing mark of 74. Looking back, I wished I studied differently, I wished I took a different course. But I cant bring back those years. It was all worth it,I met a lot of people, gained friends and learned tons and tons of mathematical equations I don't think I ever used in my job. But everything happens for a reason. And my diploma served well in my career now.

Fast track to today....

I recently took a course and had to take the exam in order to move on to the next course. I failed. I really studied hard for this exam. But then again, maybe not enough. My results were not bad but I did not reach the passing mark of 300 points. I got 296 only. It was a difficult test. It was computer based. I can take it again but I have to wait 30 days before a retake.

Obviously I was very upset. But it did not bring any tears. I guess, I've grown much more and have learned to accept that failure makes you stronger. Each time we fail, we get up and try again, its like falling.

“Keep on beginning and failing. Each time you fail, start all over again, and you will grow stronger until you have accomplished a purpose - not the one you began with perhaps, but one you'll be glad to remember.”